Nickelodeon Creativity: For the Young and Young-at-Heart

The Lighter Side of Children

Having children is like living in a frat house - nobody sleeps, everything's broken, and there's a lot of throwing up. -- Ray Romano   Becoming a mom to me means that you have accepted that for the next 16 years of your life, you will have a sticky purse. -- Nia Vardalos   If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands? -- Milton Berle   A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it. -- Jerry Seinfeld   When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out. -- Erma Bombeck   90% of parenting is just thinking about when you can lie down again. -- Anonymous   Mom Pro Tip: If you're old enough to critique what I put in your lunch, you're old enough to make it yourself.   I love when my kids tell me they're bored. As if the lady standing in front of a full sink of dirty dishes is where you go to get ideas about how to have a good time.  -- Anonymous   I'd love to be a Pinterest mom. But it turns out I'm more of an Amazon Prime mom.  -- Anonymous   Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing. --Phyllis Diller   Not all who wander are lost. Some are just moms. In Target. Hiding from their children.   And then I thought to myself, "What's the point of cleaning if my family is going to keep living here?  -- Anonymous   The quickest way for a parent to get a child's attention is to sit down and look comfortable. --Lane Olinghouse   The trouble with children is that they're not returnable. -- Quentin Crisp   When children are doing nothing, they are doing mischief. -- Henry Fielding