Nickelodeon Creativity: For the Young and Young-at-Heart

The Lighter Side of Children

The Lighter Side of Children

Having children is like living in a frat house - nobody sleeps, everything's broken, and there's a lot of throwing up. -- Ray Romano


Becoming a mom to me means that you have accepted that for the next 16 years of your life, you will have a sticky purse.

-- Nia Vardalos


If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?

-- Milton Berle


A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it.

-- Jerry Seinfeld


When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out.

-- Erma Bombeck


90% of parenting is just thinking about when you can lie down again.

-- Anonymous


Mom Pro Tip: If you're old enough to critique what I put in your lunch, you're old enough to make it yourself.


I love when my kids tell me they're bored. As if the lady standing in front of a full sink of dirty dishes is where you go to get ideas about how to have a good time. 

-- Anonymous


I'd love to be a Pinterest mom. But it turns out I'm more of an Amazon Prime mom. 

-- Anonymous


Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing.

--Phyllis Diller


Not all who wander are lost. Some are just moms. In Target. Hiding from their children.


And then I thought to myself, "What's the point of cleaning if my family is going to keep living here? 

-- Anonymous


The quickest way for a parent to get a child's attention is to sit down and look comfortable.

--Lane Olinghouse


The trouble with children is that they're not returnable.

-- Quentin Crisp


When children are doing nothing, they are doing mischief.

-- Henry Fielding


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